Let's be honest....there are days when I just want to be lazy and do whatever I want to do. I don't want to answer to anyone and I don't want to be responsible for anything. I want to stay in bed all day and pretend I have escaped to a remote country where they have no phones, internet or ways to contact me. There are days when I want to shut off my emotions and pull out my brain so it will stop trying to figure things out. There are days when I wish I could hit the pause button on life and just breathe a bit without feeling the pressure of "stuff" calling my name. There are days when all I want is a "ME" day.

Is there anything wrong with wanting a "me" day? The truth is that it's perfectly fine to have a day for "me;" a day when I can refresh myself and rejuvenate so I have a better outlook on life and so I am ready to get up and go again. All of us need to find time to have a "me" day and if you haven't had one in quite some time, then you need to schedule a "Me" day. We especially need "me" days when we are married. Too often, we think that spending time for "me" is selfish but the opposite is true. Research tells us that there needs to be a healthy balance between togetherness and separateness in marriages. Too much togetherness eliminates the "you" in the relationship and too much separateness eliminates connection between spouses. We actually are better in our marriages when we schedule "me" days with each other and then honor those days.

Now, let me clarify there is a BIG difference between a "me" day and a "poor me" day. The difference is in our attitude and in the way we are feeling. A "poor me" day is a repetitive thought and feeling process where I become selfish and my attitude sinks to a place of discouragement and dispare. A "poor me" day doesn't make me better when I have taken time for myself it makes me bitter because I spend my time thinking about all the things that are wrong in my life. A "poor me" day doesn't rejuvenate me at all; it drains me. I think if we were honest, many of us would say that we have "poor me" days pretty often.....in fact, probably more frequently than we want to admit.

Now that we understand the difference between a "me" day and a "poor me" day and that a "me" day is healthy for us, when was the last time you had a day for you? A day when you allowed yourself to be refreshed? If you can't remember, then it's been too long. Give yourself and your marriage a gift by scheduling your next "me" day!